It's my 53rd birthday.

Actually, i was really glad my birthday  fell on a sunday. i thought i could escape it being celebrated in school by my numerous students. But alas, the kids nowadays are very smart indeed, quite proactive i might say so myself. They had it planned to celebrate my birthday , which i had not expected. Memang lah budak-budak 4 ehsan,,,,,,,,buat macam-macam helah so that i enter the class during recess. What if i mc that day.....macam mana mereka nak serahkan kek tu ek....hmmmm. tapi saya tak mc, patutnye ambil mc. nak buat aper ambil mc. sebenarnye kadang-kadang rase amat penat sebab banyaknye kerja laaa ni. Badminton tournament x selesai lagi, budak2 tu sibuk n merengek2 setiap kali bila nak main...adoiii yaiii. fening kefala. lagi pulak dah mula latihan utk rumah sukan.......macamlah budak2 tu suma nak datang buat latihan utk rumah. cikgu dtg 4 n d kids dtg x sampaipon 25....ok ker tu...ok jer lerrr. well to add to dat, ketas peksa blom siap bungkus lagi....tak per, kerani di rumah ramai bole bantu ahem ahem. What about the exercise books to be marked....wadush wadush mmg x sanggup . bagi kerja tapi buku yg dah dikumpul x siap tanda lagi kah3...mmg ketawa besar. pastu budak2 ni cakap buku dia hilang...pelik pegi mane ek....toyol da x curi duit ker,,sekarang da curi buku exercise budak2 nin pulak, x masuk akal betul..Tambah berganda-ganda  fening!!!

      berbalik kpd cerita sambut befday tadi. Omirul pon jadi alasan tambah dgn ustazah nabilah sekali memainkan peranan utk dapatkan saya masuk ke kelas. Sebenarnye saya malulah bila sambut-sambut befday ni tapi dek kesian ngan budak2 yg da berusaha utk adakan sambutan itu, saya turutkan lah jugak. Thank you mursyid for the lonnnng prayers. Amin.Zul fikri yg pi belikan kek ye? tq jugak. sapa yg kutip duit, pon trima kasih gak. tq to luvly bella for menatang kek itu dgn berhati-hati, hehehe ada bakat....Nak pendekkan cerita, saya takut kalu2 nnti ade lg yg nak sambut belated befday pulak......ape strategy saya nak mengelakkan diri ek, Anyway you kids are mischevous n knivingly clever to come up with that berthday plan, tqvm to all my 4 ehsan students.....Hohoho cerita banyak keje sebenarnye blom abis lg...ade banyak cerita nak share tp x de mase lah...adios till my next entry..

Too busy to even visit my blog

So many many things had happened the last time I was here. I just can't find find the time nor squeeze myself between any of my chores to write. Pathetic isn't it.Well that's a reality all of us have to face.Actually there's many a times I want to leave my remarks but alas......

To start with, sports over so yeayyyyy. Canteen day also over....another BIG yeay and yahoo, Thank God.  wheew. THe charity dinner also oredi over. hah thats a great relief too.yehaa.

HEI ThE ORAL FOR form three is also done. Seriously, that pentaksir kawasan was a really strict lady. Wow how stingy can you get with marks? I thought the students were quite ok but she gave them so little marks. Kedekut habis.

Guess what ? I took a whole tupperware of durian to school this week. Weh, ramai org mmg suka makan durian ekkk. Diaorang memang makan dengan semangat sekali. best pulak tengok org makan sambil menjilat-jilat jari. They really appreciate the durians. Bebudak kat rumah nih kurang sket ngan durian...agaknya lah....

This week jugak dah pi ambil baju raya dah siap tempah. Terkebil kebil jugaklah bila tebal duit yg bertukar tangan. Adussssh tp pejam mmata je.......suka sbb baju dah siap


At the school canteen , dah melambak org letak sample kuih utk order raya. At the staffroom too, there are numerous  samples too. tak order pun tp best and kenyang rase sample. Bila lapar pergi ambil kuih , beberapa keping pulak tu dan masih tak order hahaha. Ramai aje cikgu yang buat gitu,,,,,tak kisah pon..

You know sometimes I feel so tired and worn out going to school and back from school. Somebody has got to change the system so that teachers like me dont feel bored and fed up with teaching. I have been in the system too long to tolerate this injustice - too many students in one class and too many periods in a day ANDDDDD holding too many posts. There you are. Ive said it in one breadth. Bravo.

Too old to be excited and nervous about school reopening next Monday

Today is already the 28th of  December. Well. well what do you know, in 5 more days I'll be back in school for my 30th year in this profession.Still an English teacher and i still feel great about that too.Another year added means I'll be 52 years old kah. kah. kah....Nothing funny but I have yet to feel my age.....not yet i guess.

Come to think of it, do i want to change my style or just maintain IT? ......hmmmmm what does IT means.....Still the colourfull socks......my funky shoes..........gee whiz i have not finalise my first impression this new year.

One thing I'm very sure of.......I'm not a class teacher. God must've answered my prayers. God is great. Mind you for 3 consecutive years l have to handle the same level of class and were they a handful......I have to emphasize something, teaching is my passion, next baking, next some other thing kah kah.... So that leaves me still being the boss for the prefects. YES I have my works cut out for me well and good.. Its just that I still do not know the classes that i will be teaching....tomorrow kot baru tau  and then the spontaneous reaction would be...lagi best tak tau.

Hei what about my style.....or better still, shall I adopt a low profile image........is that suitable.....pening, pening pening......I really am still blurrrr on this predicament ...konon jer tu. sebenar dah plan sesuatu kah kah kah.....

dah mula masak n bagi markah

Saya suka makanan yg sedap. Saya amat suka makanan yg sedap. tapi susah nak dapat n jumpa. Sometimes it is expensive, Sometimes we dont get the opportunity to get it. most of the time i dont go to places that serve all these delicious flavours.  Sedihkan.
Masalah yg dihadapi ialah nak makan tp mood masak berangin. Sekejapje rasa rajin, pastu mood malas menjadi-jadi. kadang2 adejer benda yg tak ade n mencukupi. Guess what, these are all lame excuses not to cook yes?..Finally I have started to cook my 1st dish.
RESEPI: Hanieliza's DAGING PRUNES
MARKAH: 90/100
komen: memang sedap ha3. *****

Sebenarnye resepi ni mmg saya da target. bila dpt buat rase teruja sgt. Tq to pn hanieliza.
x pandai nk masukkan gambar. Next time saya akan cubanbagi komen yg lebih detail tentang penilaian saya, In saya buat suka2 jer. Maybe anak saya boleh ambil suma resepi yg saya dah cuba n nilai. dia pulak bole kumpul n cuba.

Memasak memang memerlukan kekuatan

Okay, now i know. I need to find and get all my energy and power reserve to start cooking. Rasanye baking senang sikit. Cooking ala-ala top chef ni memang getir. 
skop untuk masak (SGT PENTING)
1. bahan2 x leh lebih drpd 10.
2. bahan mesti mudah didapati....mana2 kedai bole dpt or jumpa
3. boleh beli bahan dalam amaun yg sedikit.
4. bahan yg berlebih boleh digunakan untuk makan atau digunakan dlm masakan hari-hari yg lain
5.bukan bahan yg pelik dan x reti nk sebut pon
6. bukan bahan yg mahal dan sikit pulak tu.
7.bukan bahan yg mudah rosak kalo tetiba x jd nk wat
8. resepi mesti boleh jd walaupon silap langkah ataupon bahan x cukup
9. proses masak x rumit 
10. sedap giler


ok  so markah 100.


Jadi setelah resepi dipilih, TOP CHEH akan memulakan kerjanya. 


Selamat maju jaya kpd resepi yg terpilih kelak. 

share recipies....anyone???

HISH TAK TAU LA, TP KINI MEMANG OBSES NK MEMASAK DAN MEnerai membuat kek atau ape ape kuih. Ade sesiapa kah di luar sana bole tolong carikan resepi yg telah dicuba n gerenti sedap dan jadi????? x nak lah bahannye yg pelik2 ok....x nklah yg susah n remeh nk dibuat ok! resepi dari dalam  atau luar negeri pon boleh. Yg turun temurun dan dari datuk n nenek pon boleh. Apabila saya dah buat, saya kan beri markah kepada masakan itu. Saya ni titlenyer.....top cheh ...yeah bukan TOP CHEF.  So apa tunggu lagi....pasing lah mana2 resepi yg boleh saya cuba.......cepat sebelom minat saya tukar kepada menjahit pulak....

arabian nite.......wah seramnyer

Bunyinyer mmg hebat. Nk g ke tidak? Masaalahnye x de baju yg sesuai. My friends suma dah sibuk beli or tempah jubah2 mereka., What abt me?????Does dat mean I have to go back to my old tricks of mix n match again. Guess what Zalia suggested? Buy those fancy chains or laces from charisma and transform it into a belt. choose one which has lots of dandlings..... then put a lace over d face like d one worn by arabic women. She would lend me hers. Wahhhhhhh. On top of that wear a special chain dangling scarf or chain over the head...well...well..well. I"m sure the roof of the Dome(khemah aje pon..he3) will collapse.

how is school nowadays?

One day, a few girls came to see me. Biasalah if u dont teach them, u dont know they existed. walaupon berseliseh setiap hari. So, guess what these girls wanted. Rupa2nye they wanted me to chaperone them to go for a visit to Berjaya Times Square. APE? Berjaya Times Square.????? Hei people, I have never put my foot at that place.. Tipu? memang betul. Someone living in Selangor as long as i did but never been there? Bunyi mcm kelakar aje kan! The girls laughed at me. SOOOO iI told them its true. I will not be able to look after them because I am the one whose going to get lost kah3. Bunyi mcm kelakar aje. i gave them one of my most piercing stares. They really thought i was joking. JOKING MY FOOT. indeed. You see, I am someone who easily forget the last sign that i passed by. I am totally out with names, numbers and dates. i am beyond help. Here they were asking for my assistance. Therefore i told them, girls go and see someother young teachers to assists them. . Guess what they replied. Thats why we come to see you!  Now I gave them one of my very appealing smiles and retorted. Girls, girls, girls..i am oredi 51 years old. . I am one very old teacher. Of course those girls refused to believe me......he3(tentu adeib marah dengar nih!!).  After eventually convincing them, I managed to get them them interested in other young and obliging teachers. they left.
Note: i am old, I am not in the slightest mood to take care of active teenagers watmore the place is alien to me.GUESS what. Ade ramai rupenye gang yg x pernah g Berjaya Times Square. Memang kelakar betul. Where have we been all these while.     We have been engrossed with marking papers for test, exams, trials, gerak gempur, ujian setara, latih tubi etc, etc, etc.     Teruknye. can it get any worse???? What do you think!!!

turbulence in friends hearts..how sad

You know, i have gone through a lot of bitter experiences in my life. One still remained fossillised and i will never forget it. I learnt many valuable lessons in overcoming this grave incident. it made me more matured and strong to survive. Too bad its too early for me to reveal this darkest secret in my life. However with the precious advice and consolation that i receive without any prejudice, I take on new challenges and obstacles with a new angle and zest. Yes, i have suffered silently at that time and the pain was devastating. it was excruciating..Life was meaningless and I have no one to turn to. Life was so unfair to me......but I thanked God I came out of the ordeal a lady less heart-broken but more mellowed and forgiving. Alas...........lately many of my dear friends are undergoing their share of torments and heart-break.

There I was, seating quietly at my table, day-dreaming......and out of the blue comes a friend in need. They would just blurt out their heart's content as if there's no tomorrow. It is fated and God is great. My prior experience has left me with an invaluable talent. I am a terribly good listener. Boy, do i listen. When my friends cry their heart"s out, mind you, I too bleed inside. Oh me gosh, do i know what they are going through! How come they turn up in front of me just to share their  pain and grief. God must have guided them to me.

A collegue has been trying to straighten  her problems with her husband for a very, very long time if i am not wrong.  She has cried, screamed and lost her temper numerous times. We had a chance to clear the air of hostility and hatred the few times that we met . Oh no, this matter is far from over.

My other friend is feeling really hopeless with her marriage. She is letting fate takes its turn.

MORE TO COME

what to do with feelings n emotions

only d title looks great but actually i am going to write on a small matter concerning the heart.. kenapa kita selalu sakit hati tentang perkara yg kecil2.. kenapa kita tiba2 jd marah sedangkan kita dah plan nak jd baik? kenapa perasaan kita mudah sangat terusik dgn perbuatan seseorang?TAPI yg paling teruk sekali, ramai di antara kita tak boleh nk sampaikan dan beritahu perkara sebenar SEDANGKAN perkara itu acap kali berlaku?

ramai orang tidak sanggup untk menanggung risiko akibat drpd berterus terang..i have told d truth once....see what happened to me..

well well what do you know

A call I received today was it. hei I got it lah hehehe

Suddenly I was inspired

I nearly got a broken heart today. But due to my good fortune, it only missed my heart by seconds. Ha3 luck is still on my side, thank God.
After making the call, my heart dropped into pieces. I had missed the train. The thing that I was looking for was out of stock. What? The advertisement just came out yesterday but it was launched in 2008. How come i did not know about it earlier? Before this my heart was not set on any of the choices given to me. There was always something not right or not up to my taste or standard. The preference was only so so. But then the moment i saw it the other day, I really liked it. it fits all the criteria I was looking for. ha3.
The next call i got still did not show any signs of hope for me. Oh dear, It seems I have to give up on it.I feel frustrated......

Bored with what to wear at my age

Actually I want to start writing right away but I have to pause awhile to focus on a keroncong song that is on now hahaha...it has such a melodious tune that it is distracting me..it really is captivating  and relaxing and harmonious wow. Well what do you know the whole program is on keroncong songs best lah. Rasa nak nyanyi sama tapi suara tak best ...........nanti ade orang sakit telinga pulak

Tak tahu lah tapi tiba-tiba rasa macam tak de baju nak pakai. Baju tak rosak atau buruk atau hilang tapi, tapi.. Last time all my clothes were baju kurung and kebaya. Then I had a few kurung moden. These were all the fashion that i restrict myself to. It is only lately that i tried out some blouses and long skirts. I mix and match. Suddenly I found out to my surprise that I could match many items , funny isn"t it. How come last time I did not do that? Weird isn"t it. Why suddenly out of the blue I want to change my style? I think i was slightly influenced by my other half. He likes to pass comments on my dressing. Maybe I look so plain. Well all this while I have been  a simple person. The truth is, I know nothing about fashion or trend. I am utterly and totally blind about fashion. I do not walk on the catwalk so style and trend does not apply. I do walk along the school corridor and in class though. Hei, not forgetting I do stand on the stage in the school hall. Then it dawned upon me that the students that i teach are my audience. They are all eyes at what you do and put on. They make comments spontaneously and truthfully. They notice every single clothing and accessories that teachers adorn. Models only display fashion during shows but teachers are models every second, Wow is that great or scaryyyyy.... 


Gee I do not know whether I am happy, glad or sad with this discovery! Not a great discovery but now I find it quite disturbing. Now why is that so...First of all, my tudung collection is very, very limited..I will let you in on a little secret..haha i have less than 20 pieces. So what does that leave me...terribly, terribly difficult to match my kurung and kebaya. So I just apply my own strategy. As long as it is the same colour, irrelevant of the tone, i works fine with me heh heh. Nobody is going to give me grades right? it is not a sin to run out of the range of colour. after all, what to do sometimes I am kedekut to fork out money to buy new tudung. Kalau makan kenyang kan , teruknye..

If you think my tudung collection is limited, my shoe collection is worst. I like to keep to one shoe, I am that type of person. But now I have broken the rule , no actually bend the rule a bit. I have in my possession 2 shoes and I  sandal. The sandal is red. I just love it. I could easily match it with blue, yellow, purple or other colours of my socks actually.. No pantang whatsoever on the colour of the socks. Amazing isn't it. I never know red can blend into just any colour. Another new discovery hehehe...puas hati

I'm still here n going strong

Yes L know it, why the sudden silence and disapperance? You know sometimes I got lots of stuff and ideas to share but time does not permit. So you people have to bear with me when i suddenly disappear okay...

These past week has been a really hectic and busy and torturing days, When you have to give marks to students memang waktu yg amat menyeksakan. First you have to finish marking, mak aii rasa nk tercabut bahu dan pening pale otak menengokkan jawapan budak-budak ni. Ape agaknye yg tersimpan dlm kepala mereka ni. Macam x pernah belajar...pelik. penat rasanye train n drill diorng nih tp tetap x menjdi.....wei susoh sebenarnye...Then you have to give d marks and check the marks . Time ni laaaa budak2 tu nk merayu markah mereka bagai nk rak. Tak tau le...kadang2 rase malas nk layan tp kesian pulak, tp sapa suruh x belajar. Ish3 kalau ikutkan hati mmg lantakkan mereka tp kite nikan cikgu and seorang ibu, mmg tak sampai hati. Kadang2 tu mmg dah naikkan markah saja nk tengok perangai mereka merengek2 minta markah, Kelakar pon ade.

Then came d part where you have to key in the marks. bab ni mmg best, kena berebut ngan gang cos suma org siap d same time therefore nk key in kena book or queue. Masa ni lah bilik gerakan peperiksaan tu sentiasa ade org kalau tak sunyi sepi. biasalah org2 veteran ni terkial-kial nk tekan nombor and semak nama pelajat. banyak kali tersasul tu mmg perkara biasa. Yg paling best lagi, setiap kali nk key in markah dah lupa proses nya. tak ingat2, tak tau le peel guru2 ni. Tapi gang peperiksaan tu mmg dah faham sgt dgn kawan2 mereka ni. Everytime they will help to open the program and set it up for us....best tak kawan gini he3 .

Sapa3 yg x siap marking mmg stress giler time nk key in markah ni. Dah lah kena menyorok sana sina nk cari pot yg sesuai nk menyiapkan marking, boss peperiksaan sentiasa dtg memanggil-manggil mengingatkan markah2 yg belum settle lagi dlm marksheet. ada pulak kadang2 markah dah key in beria-ia tp  tak save kah3. KENA BUAT BALIK SEMULA.... hehehe tension. Cerita bab peperiksaan ni banyak tp malas nk continue sebab tak kuasa.....

Oh dear how time really flies.....

My anger did not subside. it went on flaming heatedly in my heart. What had sparked off that untimely incident? It was none other than a boy in my class who had rudely told me to move away from the board while i was still writing notes on the board. Can you imagine how I felt? There I was writing big and clearly on the board so that they could read my handwriting, and this boy suddenly shouted loudly for me to step aside!!!!. Hei, what do you think am I doing standing in front of the class? Posing for pictures to be taken is it? Am I not also hard at work trying to cover as much notes as possible just before the exam starts ???( didn't realise there were so many questions circling in my head at that time) Was it not me who always try to come up with spot question and answers so that these students could score? Was it not this lady that always give them short notes to memorise in case they got stuck not being able to answer any questions at all...


Then it happened. Out of the blue, a sudden realisation hit me. The words really struck a sensitive chord in my heart. I became dumb founded with hurt and dismay. What, why, how could he had said that.... I was beyond reconcile. I put my marker pen down, close my books and told the class I was done with the lesson....my last word hanging without any fullstop. It took me by surprise too that my reaction was that severe. The boy thought i was joking when I stopped writing. Yeah, this time i maent business. Those words had actually severed a major vein in my heart and it was utterly and hopelessly beyond repair...

HOW TIME FLIES.....

Wah, it has been nearly a month since I last up dated my blog. On my bday I had really wanted to jot down something but alas, time does not permit. What a joke, I did start to scribble something but I was interrupted therefore I stopped. The next thing I know, I just couldn't find my notes. Ha3 something weird had happened actually. I had actually trespassed into my daughter's blog by mistake. Of course she did not log out......soooo I just typed innocently thinking it was my blog.... The rest you will know what happened when you read my daughter's entry, kih3 klakar.

These last few days I had undergone quite a hectic life. What with the exam coming for the form threes n form fours , you have to make sure they know everything allready so that they can answer the questions when the time comes. You know what, trying to make students understand is no easy job. There you are thinking out ways n methods so that things make sense to them, some of these kids do not appreciate it at all. So a few days before exam, cikgu ni dah meletup and mengamuk. Ape taknye, sakit tekak kita mengulang-ulang benda yang sama, ape yang dia kisahnyer... Hish, sabar ajer... Actually, i do not give up on the kids, I am quite tough too knowing my age, but they do get on your nerves sometimes, or many, many TIMES....more than I can say lah.

So that day when I merajuk nak mengajo kelas tu, dia faham lak tu. Menggelegak hati rase macam nak menjerit and marah-marah tapi....

terharu nye bila....

read this" Rasullah SAW bersabda yg maksudnya: " Org2 mukmin yg paling sempurna imannya ialah mereka yg paling baik akhlaknya dan sebaik-baik manusia daripada kalangan kamu ialah mereka yg paling baik kepada isterinya." - riwayat Abu Daud. Well guess who read that caption to me today??? My hubby. The question that came after that was," Am I good to you?"

Saya berasa amat terharu terus tergamam . Ape nak jawab? Of course he has been kind to me. He cares about his children tp biasa la, tak tau mcm mane nk tunjuk. He does it in his own special way but not obvious. Hey, kids! if u r reading this, pay heed to this situation or statement OK!!! Your parents, many of them r of d same age as me - 50 ++. They just do not know how to show they love u. These things were not taught by their parents too. Those who do show their love , learnt it themselves how to do it.

dah pulih dengan sendirinya

Suddenly I have recovered. thank God I have gotten over that down and depressed feelings. Sports, check- over. Room make over, check - still in process. Exam questions, check belum siap...haaa ni yang berat ni.

You see, nak buat soalan peperiksaan bukannye mudah. You have to take many aspects into consideration. kadang-kadang pelik, when you set the questions too easy,many students will fail. However if the questions are tough, many students will survive the test and passed, pelikkkan....

Setting the questions means all have been covered, the syllabus i mean.  Sometimes your colleges have not done so, therefore you have to tell them what you have set so that they can prepare the students. if not parents will complain. preparing the students is not easy work. the more you tell them whats coming out, the more they will blunder. kah3. But what to do, sometimes teachers feel guilty not tranning the students but students ni memang tak faham-faham. jadi sebenarnye tak payah nak train mereke semua ni. Bila results keluar memang melukakan hati, pecah dan hancur berderai-derai. Kadang-kadang rasa sia-sia aje mengajar budak-budak ni, dia buat tak tau je.

entahle tiba-tiba aje

Dont know why but tiba-tiba aje rasa depressed, murung, sedih n sakit hati. Banyak benda belum settle tapi malas nak uruskan. Bila layan perasaan rasa sedih...... hmmmm x leh layan cos menyusahkan diri sendiri aje nanti. Actually nobody can read your mind. if you are sad you must tell someone, but which someone. Sometimes the matter is quite sensitive to be told n shared. Not sure people will understand or can lighten the burden. Sometimes rasa nak mengamuk tapi takut pulak risiko nye.Hish bagaimana nak melepaskan perasaan yang amat mengganggu jiwa.

People can be very annoying without their knowing it or maybe they purposely like to annoy people. no names mentioned but but but...

really when I'm depressed i dont like it at all. i cannot settle many chores. my, my, that will lead to more problems. Nobody can help laaaaaa. Sakitnye hati

Most of the time memang i am happy go lucky.x kisah banyak benda. I am not too attached to people so people cannot gauge my real feelings. You see the older you get the more sensitive you are. I am no different. There were times i wish to pour out my heart's content but have no strength to do so. x sampai hati pun ade jugak. x tahu le